Judgemental
by idwir
Summary: Clare's not pregnant - she's still a virgin! Then what's wrong with her?
1. 033011

"Clare," Eli Goldsworthy gently shook his girlfriend's shoulder. "Come on, wake up. You're gonna be late for school. You fell asleep down here?"

Clare groaned. Honestly, the couch wasn't that comfortable and the pillow she was using was as hard as a rock. She had fallen asleep really early the day before, but felt like she could sleep for another week. "Leave me alone." she murmured in a hoarse voice.

"Clare."

"Five more minutes." Clare put a pillow over her head.

"In five _seconds_, I'm gonna undress you and stick you in the shower myself." Eli warned.

Clare groaned once more. "Fine." She dragged the word out as she stretched, wincing at the bright light streaming in through the window. "I hate you." She glared at Eli.

"I love you, too." He smirked as usual and pecked her on the lips. "Now go." She dragged herself off the itchy brown couch and went as quickly as possible up to her room. She looked around and saw only one thing she wanted: her bed. She laid down as carefully as possible.

* * *

Eli looked at his watch. Five minutes had passed and he did not hear the sounds of a shower running. He took the stairs two at a time.

"Clare!" he called up. He knocked on her bedroom door. "Clare?" When he got no response, he pushed her door open. There she was lying on her bed, sleeping. Eli walked over to her and tried to shake her shoulder.

"Mmm." Clare grumbled, pushing his hand away from her shoulder and rubbing her hand over her face. "Ow." Clare opened her eyes, sitting up. Blood dripped into her right eye.

"Oh, my gosh, Clare," Eli grabbed some tissue off of her night stand and held it to her forehead. "What happened?" He grabbed her hands, searching them. "You must have scratched yourself with your ring. You're not wearing a ring. Are your nails really that long?"

"I'm gonna go shower," Clare got up. Seeing Eli's expression, she told him, "I'm fine! Really." She turned back around to walk into her bathroom.

"Clare."

"What?"

"We're late."

**Comments? Concerns? Questions? Complaints? Just lmk:):)**


	2. 033111

**JDDCdaner1497 – thank you:):)**

**Thanks for the reviews:):) I hope you guys aren't disappointed.**

"Mr. Goldsworthy, nice of you to join us." Mrs. Dawes smiled at Eli. Then turning her attention to Clare she said, "Nice to you see you, Miss Edwards."

Eli smirked and Clare gave a weak smile. They both took their seats. Immediately, Adam leaned over.

"Hey, where were you guys? You missed like half the day." His eyes caught on Clare's wet hair and the tired dark circles under her eyes.

"Sleeping." Eli answered truthfully.

And he wasn't lying. As soon as Clare came out of the shower twenty minutes later, dragging her feet, she had laid back down on the bed right next to Eli. Right after, she sat up, went to her dresser and back into the bathroom, coming out again, this time in sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt.

"Clare?" Eli had questioned.

"Mmm," she groaned for the billionth time that day. She laid back down, burying her face in his arm.

"Did you miss the part of our conversation earlier where I told you we're late?"

"First period. Sleep." Clare spoke in incomplete sentences. "Curtains. Close."

So Eli had gotten up to close Clare's curtains and then laid next his girlfriend as she slept for the next three hours. He had fallen asleep after Clare had asked for hour two, but after the third hour, he made himself take a shower, then he had forced Clare to take another one and drove them to school.

The only thing that got her out of bed was Eli reminding her of their English assignment that was due.

"Mr. Goldsworthy? Your interpretation on that line? 'It all depends on the outcome.'" Mrs. Dawes asked.

"He doesn't know what he should feel yet because he's waiting for the facts." Eli answered.

"And what is the author trying to say to you when you read this poem, Miss Edwards?" Mrs. Dawes asked another question. "Clare? Clare?"

The whole class turned to stare at Clare. She shook her head, then looked at Mrs. Dawes. "I'm sorry?"

Mrs. Dawes repeated her question. "What is the author trying to say to you when you read this poem?" Receiving another blank look from Clare, she rephrased her question," What is the author's message?"

"I'm sorry, I-I don't know, I …" Clare trailed off hanging her head.

"Mr. Torres, the answer please."

Adam jumped at his name. "The hardest part is waiting, but once you know the answer, sometimes you just want to go back to when you didn't know the answer."

"Very good." The bell rang. "Read the poem on page 223 by Emily Dickinson for homework tonight and we'll discuss it in class tomorrow. Don't forget to turn in your papers before you leave. Miss Edwards, can I have a word with you please?"

Eli and Adam looked at Clare. "I'll meet you after school," Clare told them. "Bad Horror Movie night, remember?"

They both left as Clare walked up to Mrs. Dawes desk, her things in hand. "Mrs. Dawes?"

Mrs. Dawes looked up from her papers. "Ah, yes, Clare." She folded her hands beneath her chin studying Clare over her glasses. "Are you okay, Clare? Is something going on that I can help you with or are you just stressed out about school? Having trouble sleeping? Late nights?"

"Huh?" Clare asked.

"You've been out of it all week, Clare. You seem tired all the time, sometimes almost sick."

"I'm fine. Really, Mrs. Dawes." Clare told her teacher.

Mrs. Dawes raised an eyebrow. "You're sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. Just a few late nights."

"Not with Mr. Goldsworthy, I hope." The teacher looked at her student sternly.

Clare blushed. "Oh, no, never. Just school work. Me and my school work." She forced a laugh.

Mrs. Dawes studied Clare for a long while. "Fine, you may go, but if you need to talk, come find me."

"Yes, of course."

"And Clare?"

"Yes, Mrs. Dawes?"

"Here's a bandaid," she said, handing Clare a bright pink bandaid. "Your other one is soaked through."

**hmmm, I hope you enjoyed the 2nd chapter. I know the writing isn't that great, but I hope you liked it. Comments? Concerns? Complaints? Questions? Just lmk:):)**


	3. 052611

**Thanks for the reviews:):)! If you have a problem, question or concern, don't be afraid to lmk !**

**Chelfrie – you scared me ! haha :):)**

**JDDCdaner1497 – you're too sweet:):)**

Five more minutes and the bell would ring, signaling the end to a very long school day for Clare. She had her head resting on her desk and she was listening to Ms. Oh talk about the Standardized math test coming up.

Four more minutes. She let her eyes close, promising that she would open them right back up, just a blink.

"Clare?" Ms. Oh came over and rubbed Clare's shoulder.

"Hmm?" Clare lifted her head, squinting her eyes.

"School is over," Ms. Oh said, smiling humorously at Clare.

"Oh! Thanks Ms. Oh. Sorry about falling asleep." Clare rushed to gather her things and ran out the door to go meet Eli and Adam, not bothering to stop by her locker. She bumped into someone.

"Hey! Watch it!" Bianca yelled. She turned to see who dared bang into her.

"Sorry," Clare said, trying to continue her run down the hallway.

"Saint Clare, are you drunk?" Bianca asked, clearly amused.

Clare stopped and turned around. "No, why?" She tilted her head a bit.

"You aren't exactly walking straight."

Clare wrinkled her brow. "Just tired." She explained. Bianca shrugged and Clare continued her journey to the outside, this time walking slowly.

"There she is," Adam said.

"Hey," Clare got into the passenger seat after Adam climbed into the back. "Sorry, I ran into someone." Clare murmured, almost inaudible.

"It's fine," Eli said, leaning over to give Clare a kiss. He backed his car out of the parking space and began the short drive over to Clare's house. They weren't even out of the school's parking lot and Clare was already fast asleep. "Hey, Adam."

Adam looked up to meet Eli's eyes in the rearview mirror. "Yeah?"

"Clare hasn't been feeling well all day, so maybe we can skip this week's horror movie night?" Eli glanced back over at a silently snoring Clare.

Adam was disappointed, but he smiled and said, "Sure. It wouldn't be much fun without Clare screaming every few seconds anyway. Just drop me off at The Dot? Drew said he was going there with Bianca." 

Eli smiled back at Adam. "Sure, thanks."

When they got back to Clare's, Eli helped Clare up to her room. He laid down next to her and cupped her cheek in his hand, "Clare. Hey, Clare. Talk to me. What's wrong?"

Clare ignored him and continued to sleep.

Eli stared at her a little while longer. He decided he should make a doctor's appointment for Clare as soon as possible. Her parents were both on extended business trips and wouldn't be home for awhile.

Eli called the doctor and scheduled an appointment for the next day.

**I hate this chapter. Sorry it took me so long to update. I was having a hard time writing and not liking what I wrote for any of my stories. I'm not sure if I like this story at all.**


	4. 081611

Clare slept all night and all morning and Eli let her. He woke her up around noon and had her eat a couple of crackers and drink some water.

"I made you a doctor's appointment at one," he told her. "Get ready and I'll take you."

All Clare did was put her hair up in a ponytail. She didn't change out of her oversized sweatshirt or her sweatpants. She started down the stairs and Eli trailed after her.

When they were almost to the hospital, Clare half opened her eyes. "Where are we going?"

Eli grabbed Clare's hand reassuringly. "To your doctor's appointment."

"I don't need to go to the doctor's. I'm fine." Clare's last word faded into silence as she drifted back to sleep.

* * *

"Ow," Clare whispered as they poked yet another needle into her. It had been a couple of days since she last went to the doctor and they did a blood test, which led them to ask her to come back for more tests. She squeezed Eli's hand and he winced.

"Okay, Miss Edwards, we're done for today." The doctor said. "You can go home and we'll call you in a few days."

"Thanks," Clare mumbled.

"By the way, will your parents be back by then?"

"Sorry" Eli interrupted. "They'll be gone for a few more months."

The doctor nodded at them and left the room.

* * *

One week later, Clare got a call to come into the doctor's office, so the next day Eli sat holding her hand as they waited for the doctor to get Clare's file. The door squeaked open and in came the doctor reading her file as he walked over to his chair behind his desk.

"Miss Edwards," the doctor said, with a look on his face Clare didn't want to think about. She braced herself, grasping Eli's hand even tighter. "You have Stage III Melanoma cancer …" That was it. It was like she was in a tunnel; her vision narrowed and she heard a loud roar in her ears. Once in awhile the loud roaring would stop and she would hear another word or two, but then it would come back. " … diagnosis … treatment … chemotherapy … radiation therapy … school …" Finally, it stopped . "If you have any questions, Clare, just call me or the hospital. I'm going to step out for a little, so you can discuss decisions and call your parents. I'll be back."

Clare sat there, stunned. She knew cancer was a possibility. She wasn't stupid, but all the same, she couldn't move, she couldn't speak.

"Clare, are you okay?" Eli asked, worried. It was like a switch flipped. Suddenly Clare was empowered. She knew what was wrong with her and now they could start fighting it.

She smiled brightly at Eli. "I'm fine. Although I didn't hear what the doctor was saying."

Eli looked at her oddly. "Are you sure you're okay? I would understand if you're not okay."

"Eli, I'm fine. I have cancer." She stopped. "I have cancer," she whispered again, just to hear herself say it. She laughed which only worried Eli more. "I have cancer and I'm fine. I feel like I can do anything now."

"Clare, stop."

"No, Eli, I'm fine. Really, really fine. I know what I have now and once I get the treatment I'll be even better."

"Clare, you didn't hear what the doctor was saying. It's gonna take awhile for you to recover. You need treatment. It's gonna make you sicker. You'll miss even more school."

"I don't care, Eli. I'm going to be fine. I just know it." Clare grabbed both his hands in hers. "I'm going to be fine." And she hugged him.

The doctor knocked and came back into his office. "Make any decisions?" he asked. "Will you be doing the radiation therapy?"

"I think so," Clare said.

"Great," the doctor smiled. "I'll get Doctor Chris and he'll explain what will happen, how often, side effects and all of that."

After talking to Doctor Chris, he sent Clare home with a consent form for her parents to sign.

Disclaimer : I don't own anything.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter.


	5. 081711

**Eclare4eva and whoever else was wondering – Melanoma cancer is skin cancer.**

.org/Cancer/SkinCancer-Melanoma/DetailedGuide/melanoma-skin-cancer-treating-by-stage

.?articlekey=4342

.com/health/melanoma/DS00439/DSECTION=symptoms

**InkBloodChambers – Don't worry:]:]**

Once they were in Eli's Hearse, Clare sighed. "How am I going to get this signed?" She held up the consent forms Doctor Chris had given her.

"Don't worry. I'm sure you can email the papers to your parents' hotel and they can fax it back signed." Eli looked over his shoulder as he pulled out of the parking stall. Then he smiled at Clare.

Clare didn't reply. She read through a few of the pages. "Eli," she said.

"Yeah?"

"What if they don't consent?" she whispered, her voice shaky.

"What?" Eli laughed. "Clare, don't be silly. They _will_ consent. They'll want you to get better. You're their daughter, Clare."

Clare took a breath. "You're right."

"I know I am," Eli said, laughing as they pulled up to Clare's house. But Clare didn't join in his laughter. "What's wrong?"

"My parents' cars are here." He turned to look where she was staring. "Both of them."

Eli grabbed Clare's hand and began rubbing circles into her palm with his thumb. "Do you want me to go in to tell them with you?"

Clare could just see it now.

_Her and Eli would sit on the couch, holding hands. "Mom, Dad, I need to tell you something important."_

_Her mom's eyes would widen and her dad would burst out, "What the hell, Clare? Tell me you're not pregnant!"_

"No, I can do it myself." Clare leaned over and kissed Eli. "Thank you for everything." She got out of the Hearse and slammed the door shut. She watched as the Hearse pulled away. All of a sudden she wanted to beg Eli to come back, to tell her parents for her. She felt like she was doing something horribly wrong. She didn't even know why she felt so bad. It wasn't like she had gotten cancer on purpose.

Walking up the steps to her door she took three deep breaths, then flew open the door. Already she could hear the yelling inside her house. She walked to where her parents were facing off in the dining room. "Mom, dad, I need you to sign these papers."

Her mom turned furiously towards her. "Not now, Clare. Can't you see we're in the middle of something?" She turned back towards Clare's father. "See. Our kids are always interrupting my conversations. They get that from you, you know …"

"Don't even try blaming that on me." Clare's dad said. Clare didn't know what they were arguing about before, but she could see it had turned into a pointless fight, where they just wanted to have something to yell about.

"Mom, please. It's important." Clare looked desperately at her mother. Her mother was back to glaring at Clare again.

"What, Clare? Is it another science field trip? If I sign it will you leave me alone?" She grabbed the papers and signed where ever there were large arrow stickers that said 'sign here'. Clare could tell she didn't even read the papers. "Really? Was a field trip so important you had to interrupt?" She shoved the papers back into Clare's hands. Clare's dad sighed irritatedly and rolled his eyes.

"Mom, I'm sick." Clare looked imploringly at her mother, then her father, her eyes filling with tears.

"Then go lay down, Clare."

"But I …"

Clare's dad looked at her. "Go to your room, Clare."

Clare felt like she couldn't breathe. She looked at her parents, shocked. Then she ran up the stairs as tears slid down her face. She slammed her bedroom door with as much strength as she could muster, which wasn't a lot these days. She tossed the papers aside. Clare fell onto her bed and hugged a pillow to her chest. Within minutes she was asleep, the tears staining her pillow.

**Sorry I made Clare's parents seem like such jerks. I actually really don't think they're like that.**

**Comments? Concerns? Complaints?**


	6. 040412

**It's been so long since I updated this story. I am so sorry! I couldn't think of anything to write and I lost interest, but I'm going to try and finish the story. Also, sorry if things don't make sense. I don't know anything about cancer, treatments and legal things, so a lot of this is made up.**

Clare was tired and nauseous all the time. At school, she could barely focus, and teachers and her classmates would give her weird looks all the time. She was constantly being asked if she was okay. Then, she heard the first rumor about herself.

"Did you hear Clare Edwards is pregnant?" she heard one girl ask another as she hid in a bathroom stall.

Clare heard someone gasp. "_Saint_ Clare?" Clare scrunched her face up in confusion. Why would anyone think Clare was pregnant?

"Yeah, Saint Clare is pregnant with that goth boy's baby. That's why she's so tired and sick all the time." Girl #1 explained. "Why else would she be throwing up all the time? It's obviously morning sickness."

Girl #2 laughed. "She's so judgmental all the time. I hope this taught her a lesson." Both girls laughed as they left the bathroom.

Clare was offended. She was shocked. People thought she was pregnant? Obviously, Clare and Eli only told Adam what was going on with her, but now people had started drawing their own conclusions. And sure, Clare could be judgmental sometimes, but only because she really cared about everyone being okay. Sure she had only Adam and Eli as friends now since K.C. and Jenna had betrayed her and started dating, and Alli was still mad at her for judging her for sleeping with Johnny, but people really thought Clare was pregnant?

Clare was brought out of her own thoughts as she heard more girls enter the bathroom. She quickly flushed the toilet, washed her hands and left to go find Eli.

The looks on the girls' faces as she passed them did not go unnoticed by Clare.

**Sorry I don't update this story more often, and when I do it's really short, but I hope you enjoyed this short thing. I know this chapter isn't really well written, so sorry again.**


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